{"product_id":"cable-guy-comic-soy-candle-scented-13-75oz-gift-for-technicians-humor-lovers","title":"Cable Guy Comic Soy Candle — Scented 13.75oz Gift for Technicians \u0026 Humor Lovers","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"182\" data-end=\"428\"\u003eI knocked on a customer’s door, expecting a routine service call. The moment she opened it, a Chihuahua came flying out full speed—straight for my ankle. That little dog latched onto my boot like it was its life’s mission, actually drawing blood.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"430\" data-end=\"497\"\u003eI looked at her and said, “Ma’am… your dog is hanging off my boot.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"499\" data-end=\"551\"\u003eShe smiled and calmly replied, “Yeah… he does that.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"553\" data-end=\"628\"\u003eAt that point I’m thinking, \u003cem data-start=\"581\" data-end=\"628\"\u003eif he does that, why would you open the door?\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"630\" data-end=\"903\"\u003eEventually, I made it inside to fix the cable behind the TV. Everything seemed fine… until I heard a low growl. I turned—and there it was. A full-grown Doberman Pinscher, teeth out, staring me down. We were at a complete standoff. I couldn’t move. He had me dead to rights.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"905\" data-end=\"985\"\u003eAll I could manage to say was,\u003cbr data-start=\"935\" data-end=\"938\"\u003e“Ma-ma-ma-ma’am… can you please call your dog?”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"987\" data-end=\"1007\"\u003eThankfully, she did.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1009\" data-end=\"1244\"\u003eAfter finishing the job, I headed for the door, ready to leave. I handed her a pen so she could sign the paperwork. A moment later, she came back holding a greasy chicken wing, breastfeeding her baby, and tried to hand me the pen back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1246\" data-end=\"1272\"\u003eAt that point, I was done.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1274\" data-end=\"1326\"\u003eI just looked at her and said:\u003cbr data-start=\"1304\" data-end=\"1307\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1307\" data-end=\"1326\"\u003e“Keep the pen.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis hand-poured soy candle brings a touch of warm nostalgia and cheeky humor to a living room, workshop, or home office. The candle burns clean for 70–80 hours from a reusable glass vessel, releasing one of three calming scents—Vanilla Bean, Comfort Spice, or Sea Breeze—while a vibrant, comic-style label wraps the jar with lighthearted storytelling. Packaged in a minimalist gray gift box, it feels ready to present whether you’re brightening a cozy night in or adding personality to a weekend repair session. The cotton wick and non-toxic, USA-grown soy wax mean you inhale fewer toxins and get a long, even burn; when the wax is gone, the glass jar cleans up beautifully to become a planter, pencil cup, or candle holder for future use.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% natural, non-toxic soy wax (USA-farmed)\u003cbr\u003e- Three scent options: Vanilla Bean, Comfort Spice, Sea Breeze\u003cbr\u003e- Reusable glass vessel with vibrant, permanent label\u003cbr\u003e- 70–80 hour average burn time with 100% cotton eco wick\u003cbr\u003e- Packaged in a gray paper gift box; assembled in the USA\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Keep the burning candle within sight, and keep away from children and pets. Never burn the candle near flammable items. For best results, burn the candle for 3 - 4 hours in each lighting and trim the wick to 1\/4\" before lighting. Discontinue use with 1\/2\" of wax remaining.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Comfort Spice \/ 13.75oz","offer_id":47774058971354,"sku":"30334050817806999502","price":27.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sea Breeze \/ 13.75oz","offer_id":47774059004122,"sku":"10750080478718760523","price":27.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Vanilla Bean \/ 13.75oz","offer_id":47774059036890,"sku":"27787483413904753385","price":27.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0797\/1867\/8746\/files\/9796681273233180261_2048.jpg?v=1776694664","url":"https:\/\/fun-gamer-dog-tag-bank-card-stickers.myshopify.com\/products\/cable-guy-comic-soy-candle-scented-13-75oz-gift-for-technicians-humor-lovers","provider":"Dog Tag Stickers\/acandlestore.com","version":"1.0","type":"link"}